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Ocean's 12

Starring George Clooney, Brad Pitt , Matt Damon, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Andy Garcia, Don Cheadle, Bernie Mac and Julia Roberts with Carl Reiner and Elliot Gould
Screenplay by George Nolfi from his screenplay Honor Among Thieves and Ocean's 11 by Ted Griffin
Directed by Steven Soderbergh

IN SHORT: Buy the bigger popcorn 'cuz this one is better than the last one. [Rated PG-13 for some language. 120 minutes]

As far as we're concerned, the best sequels manage to sum up all that has come before in less time than it would take us to write it all out for y'all. That feat is accomplished easily in George Nolfi's screenplay for Ocean's 12, which reintroduces casino owner Terry Benedict (Andy Garcia) as the pissed off ex-mark of the first film. Benedict has somehow been tipped as to who ripped him off in Oceans 11 and tracks the principles down from coast to coast, demanding his money back in two weeks time with substantial interest tacked on top. That totals out to a tad over $198 millions of dollars which, considering that he was fully insured for the original heist, means he'll be getting more than two buck for every original dollar heisted. Not bad for a bunch of threatening moves <g>

For those who have forgotten the principle players: Danny Ocean (George Clooney) has tried to settle down in Connecticut with his lovely, non-criminal wife Tess (Julia Roberts). Rusty Ryan (Brad Pitt) has also tried the settling down route, though his choice of European detective (Catherine Zeta-Jones) proves not to be a wise one. "The Kid" of the team, Linus Caldwell (Matt Damon), itches for more of a leadership role when the next caper comes along. Dumb kid. Also returning in the overstuffed cast are the connected elders Reuben Tishkoff (Elliot Gould)and Saul Bloom (Carl Reiner), Cockney safecracker Basher Tarr (Don Cheadle), a limber limbed inside "greaseman" (Shaobo Qin) and the ever popular Frank Catton (Bernie Mac). Put 'em all together and you get one great comedy. All of the important stuff detailing what you've missed during the last three years is unleashed early in the first act. The new situation is then set in motion and everything that follows does so with all the velocity of a snowball rolling down a very steep hill.

As we said, the whole point of the film is for our merry band of outlaws to pull off an even bigger "job" in less than two week's time, all to pay back the nasty man they ripped off in the last movie. Failure to do so will mean an ultimate penalty will be paid. It will be painful. Very, very painful and absolutely deadly (though we'd doubt that Benedict would leave any bodies or body parts to be found). The target this time out is a Faberge egg, most of which were created for the Czar of Russia and all of which are made of gold and encrusted in precious jewels. In the shape of an egg. Manufactured by Faberge, the guy whose name is now a household word to any person of the feminine gender.

Not to mention the fact that there are more surprises stuffed into the third act that any average moviegoer will be bouncing on their seats like a little kid, wondering if any of the cameo appearances will turn into more than a bit part.

We're obviously filling space here because we don't want to give anything away. Ocean's Twelve is too much fun, and packed with too many surprises and plot twists and turns that even if we wrote 'em all down we couldn't keep 'em straight. Some critics exist solely to tell you everything about everything, thus negating the need to spend the ten bucks for a ticket. We didn't go to that school. Spend the money.

On average, a first run movie ticket will run you Nine Bucks. Were Cranky able to set his own price to Ocean's 12, he would have paid . . .


Heck, if we could remember any of the details we'd be close to a perfect see it twice ten dollar level. But we don't and we weren't steamrollered enough to want to see it twice. Definitely take a date. Actually if you've got more than one dating possibility add extra to the rating. heh heh heh

Click the links for CrankyCritic StarTalk with Brad Pitt, George Clooney and Catherine Zeta-Jones

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